I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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