Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
