Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
