And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Drake has all the answers
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
