In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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