low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
