I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
