Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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