I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
