Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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