people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize