Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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