I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
