I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
