I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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