Its about making memories worth repressing
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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