I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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