Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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