But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
