I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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