THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize