We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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