I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Randomize