Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize