oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
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