I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
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I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
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He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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