Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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