why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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