I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize