if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
