I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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