there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
