did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
