soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize