I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
