I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He has the fingertips of a God
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