She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
