16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
This couple is walking their pig around campus
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
