WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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