ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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