and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
