If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
