Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
This baby is an asshole
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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