I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
