Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize