Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
