i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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