no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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