Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
