She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
