I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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