I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
